No one ever went to the moon without stepping outside of their comfort zone. While, I certainly don’t plan on going to the moon any time soon I do have big, scary, life changing goals for myself. These goals are not something that I can just wake up tomorrow and accomplish. They are goals that take hard work, discipline, and sacrifice.
I’ll be the first to admit that sometimes I let fear get in my way. Even allowed fear (equal parts fear and knowing my body) come between me and running the Austin Marathon in February. I am absolutely done with that. I am ready to look fear straight in the eye, and laugh in its face.
I WILL be running the San Francisco Marathon on June 16th (my BIRTHDAY) with so many other baller runners like Pavement Runner, Josephine, Krissy, Lauren, (hopefully) Jane and so many many many others that I hope do not feel offended by me leaving them out!!!!!
I even started training THIS week. The day I signed up I went out for my first training run… Which granted, was 28 weeks away from the race. However, if I have learned anything from this last half-marathon training cycle it is this:
I know my body. I know what it is capable of. Some people can go out and train for 12-13 weeks for a marathon and ROCK it… I, am not yet one of those people. Someday, I hope to be able to say that I am in that group of bad ass runners. But, I am not there yet, and that’s perfectly okay. It will take me the next 6 months to get 26.2 ready. I have NO shame in that.
WHY do I have no shame in that??? Because I am strong enough of a runner and human being to know my limits. I know that I need to step out of my comfort zone, but I also know where and when my body says OK ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. I need 28 weeks because quite frankly, I need more cut back weeks than a lot of runners do.
My right hip will taunt me for the rest of my life. I have learned that in the past 2 years. I trained too hard, too intensely, too long as a gymnast… As an adult I am paying the price. Am I sorry for the intensity of my training as a teenager? ABSOLUTELY NOT. Do I wish that it was easier for me as a runner, now? Absolutely. But, I have come to terms with the fact that I have done damage to my body. I have come to terms with the fact that I am not as natural of a runner as some people out there.
I work hard to run a FIVE FRIGGIN K. I work ridiiiiiiiiiculously hard to run a half-marathon. I know several people who have the the ability to wake up on a Friday and decide they are running a half marathon that Sunday. I am not, and very well may NEVER be that person.
There was a time (in fact that time was NOT that long ago at all) in which I felt SAD that I wasn’t that person.. However, I have realized in the last few months that everybody is drastically different. Everyone’s body was built drastically different. More importantly, everybody’s life has determined whether or not they can be that runner as an adult.
I have come to terms with the fact that my body may not have been built to run. But, that does not mean that I can’t run. That doesn’t mean that I can’t train it (in a healthy way) to be a runner. We have the ability to be whoever and whatever want to be.
I WANT TO BE A MARATHONER. I will be a marathoner, in 27 weeks. On June 16th, my 25th birthday, I will be a marathoner. I will have earned the title.
While some of the runners I know won’t start training for SF for another 10ish weeks, I am proud to have started last week. I am proud of the fact that I pushed my fears aside and said I CAN DO WHATEVER I PUT MY HEART AND SOUL INTO.
There is no going back for this runner. I have registered for the race. I have booked the flights. I have even made hotel arrangements. All that is left is awaiting the ability to book a rental car… (which may take until race day since THAT is when I’ll be legal for most rental cars.. darn you guys and your 25+ year laws…pffft)